Online product: Just as good as the original!

The following came from one of our loyal contributors:

If the goal of the teasers on the Web site is to get us to pay to access the lame-o stories within, you'd think that the geniuses making decisions at the Herald-Press would at least entice us to read the stories.

So we look at the new-and-improved pay-to-play online product and we find this headline: "Man gets 187 year for child molesting." Nothing like a grammatical error in the headline to demonstrate your professionalism — particularly since it's in the online headline, which could be fixed if anyone either (a) cared or (b) knew better.

But wait, there's more!

The first line of the story on the Web site says this: "A convicted child molester received practically the equivalent of a three-lifetime sentence."

You have to love the phrase "practically the equivalent." It must mean it's just like it, almost, kind of, sort of.

It's brilliant journalism for the 21st century, however. It says everything, even as it says nothing.

You know what? It's worked! Sign me up for the pay site. I want more of this!

Paxton Media -- in tune with the times.